Equus ferus sapiens or Homo animus deceptus
I did not intend for this to happen, for my intention was in truth a lot simpler and a lot more innocent than it may seem. Yet at some point, I lost myself. I may no longer remember the details on where, when and how it happened amidst all the confusion, but I found myself lying on the grass in a whole new world I had never seen before. It felt odd, but for some strange reason I was happy and I tried to express this happiness. To my surprise, only a nicker came out of my mouth and at that moment I realised I had been turned into a horse, a mare. I was sad and desperate, for I did not want that to happen, it was not my choice.
Yet I kept wandering the new lands, still faithful to the purpose that led me all the way here. I had no idea, however, about how to proceed from then on. I still have no idea. The only things I can do are explore and eat. I bear neither saddle nor reins. I cannot be used as a beast of burden. No, reader of this scroll, do not get any fancy ideas about equipping me and making me your mount. I am bound only to one whose name shall remain hidden for now and none other may ride on my back, unless it is my choice and my choice only.
A simple life is enough to keep me happy: galloping through the wild, eating grass, occasionally eating scrolls whose owners have not worked enough to fill them with inkblots. Ink does ruin the taste of both paper and parchment, thus keeping scrolls full with ink at all times is a most efficient way to make them inedible. Like this one you are reading now.
Hmm, what was I saying? Yes, a simple life is enough to keep me happy, yet even in this horse form I have the right to wish and dream. So here lies my one and only wish: to be released from this horse prison and reclaim my old self. I do not know how it can be done, if it can be done at all, but I will keep dreaming of the time when it will come true. Till then, I will continue living the simple miserable life of a mare...
Yet I kept wandering the new lands, still faithful to the purpose that led me all the way here. I had no idea, however, about how to proceed from then on. I still have no idea. The only things I can do are explore and eat. I bear neither saddle nor reins. I cannot be used as a beast of burden. No, reader of this scroll, do not get any fancy ideas about equipping me and making me your mount. I am bound only to one whose name shall remain hidden for now and none other may ride on my back, unless it is my choice and my choice only.
A simple life is enough to keep me happy: galloping through the wild, eating grass, occasionally eating scrolls whose owners have not worked enough to fill them with inkblots. Ink does ruin the taste of both paper and parchment, thus keeping scrolls full with ink at all times is a most efficient way to make them inedible. Like this one you are reading now.
Hmm, what was I saying? Yes, a simple life is enough to keep me happy, yet even in this horse form I have the right to wish and dream. So here lies my one and only wish: to be released from this horse prison and reclaim my old self. I do not know how it can be done, if it can be done at all, but I will keep dreaming of the time when it will come true. Till then, I will continue living the simple miserable life of a mare...
The revelation
This last year, since my arrival to this mysterious and interesting realm and my confinement inside a horse's body, has been focused in making contact with my lord and rider. I prefer to use both words, for it has been in my intent to build a strong bond with him for both myself and the horse. Knowing him well and for several years, before both he and I arrived here, I knew that talking to him straight away, as I normally do, and explaining him my situation as it is would hurt him in levels that even I cannot imagine.
Thus, I chose to follow a more subtle and shady way to prepare him for the ultimate revelation. I would bring the horse to his location only when he would be asleep and talk to him, so that he would be unable to connect the voice he would hear with the horse he could see. I would also speak to him in riddles and in a way that would help him face whichever challenge would come his way, while making him confident enough that my voice is the result of his own imagination. Those riddles, word after word, verse after verse, puzzle after puzzle, seemed to help him connect long lost pieces of his memory together, but more importantly to prepare him for the inevitable moment of our meeting face to face.
In this year, I saw my lord and rider fall into a state of madness, fueled by fear and despair, later strengthened by guilt and grief. I saw the darkness claim him and the water nearly take his life, were I not there to pull him out by convincing the horse to drag him by his wrist with her teeth. I feared that the more time I waste with petty riddles trying to prepare him, the less chance I would have to find him still himself.
Thus, I prepared my last puzzles: one for him and one for the rest of the people of the realm. I shall not speak of the former, for I have yet to hear his response. The latter, however, was nothing more than a simple message bearing his favorite motto written in one of the Elven languages and dialects and asking people to translate it and bring their response to him, rather than me. I may not have given them enough information and clues to find the exact quote, but it was enough to trigger the right words in his mind and reveal my presence to him.
At this point, I do need to mention the one who worked diligently to translate and deliver my message to my lord and rider. When I had nearly lost all hope that someone would bother themselves with a silly message sent by an irrational horse, Nimrodel was the one to follow my directions to the letter and bring my message to his attention and for this she has my eternal gratitude.
From then on, everything seems to have come naturally, even though the pain in his face was more than obvious to me, in spite of all the preparations I had made. But now, he finally does know the true message I came bearing for him: I am his lady and the Messenger. I am the horse and I am the rider.
Thus, I chose to follow a more subtle and shady way to prepare him for the ultimate revelation. I would bring the horse to his location only when he would be asleep and talk to him, so that he would be unable to connect the voice he would hear with the horse he could see. I would also speak to him in riddles and in a way that would help him face whichever challenge would come his way, while making him confident enough that my voice is the result of his own imagination. Those riddles, word after word, verse after verse, puzzle after puzzle, seemed to help him connect long lost pieces of his memory together, but more importantly to prepare him for the inevitable moment of our meeting face to face.
In this year, I saw my lord and rider fall into a state of madness, fueled by fear and despair, later strengthened by guilt and grief. I saw the darkness claim him and the water nearly take his life, were I not there to pull him out by convincing the horse to drag him by his wrist with her teeth. I feared that the more time I waste with petty riddles trying to prepare him, the less chance I would have to find him still himself.
Thus, I prepared my last puzzles: one for him and one for the rest of the people of the realm. I shall not speak of the former, for I have yet to hear his response. The latter, however, was nothing more than a simple message bearing his favorite motto written in one of the Elven languages and dialects and asking people to translate it and bring their response to him, rather than me. I may not have given them enough information and clues to find the exact quote, but it was enough to trigger the right words in his mind and reveal my presence to him.
At this point, I do need to mention the one who worked diligently to translate and deliver my message to my lord and rider. When I had nearly lost all hope that someone would bother themselves with a silly message sent by an irrational horse, Nimrodel was the one to follow my directions to the letter and bring my message to his attention and for this she has my eternal gratitude.
From then on, everything seems to have come naturally, even though the pain in his face was more than obvious to me, in spite of all the preparations I had made. But now, he finally does know the true message I came bearing for him: I am his lady and the Messenger. I am the horse and I am the rider.
"Ui rontar polir nutië estel, Oiranwë."
"No shackles can enchain hope."
"No shackles can enchain hope."
Random bits of wisdom collected through the years
"Give the wanderer a destination, show him the way to it and he is as good as dead." ~ Anonymous
"The road ahead is filled with all kinds of obstacles, but we can overcome most of them with patience, persistence and a healthy degree of paranoia." ~ Anonymous
"If it comes, then it will come. If it does not, then it will not." ~ My rider
"Absence from those we love is self from self - a deadly banishment." ~ William Shakespeare
"Life is pretty simple: You do some stuff. Most fails. Some works. You do more of what works. If it works big, others quickly copy it. Then you do something else. The trick is the doing something else." ~ Leonardo da Vinci
"Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it is not." ~ Oscar Wilde
"I do not need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better." ~ Plutarch
"The empty vessel makes the loudest sound." ~ William Shakespeare
"Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something." ~ Plato
"Nature does nothing in vain." ~ Aristotle
"Only entropy comes easy." ~ Anton Chekhov
"The artist is a receptacle for emotions that come from all over the place: from the sky, from the earth, from a scrap of paper, from a passing shape, from a spider's web." ~ Pablo Picasso
"In my view you cannot claim to have seen something until you have photographed it." ~ Émile Zola
"True artists are almost the only men who do their work for pleasure." ~ Auguste Rodin
"Art is a lie that makes us realize truth." ~ Pablo Picasso
"True friends stab you in the front." ~ Oscar Wilde
"The road ahead is filled with all kinds of obstacles, but we can overcome most of them with patience, persistence and a healthy degree of paranoia." ~ Anonymous
"If it comes, then it will come. If it does not, then it will not." ~ My rider
"Absence from those we love is self from self - a deadly banishment." ~ William Shakespeare
"Life is pretty simple: You do some stuff. Most fails. Some works. You do more of what works. If it works big, others quickly copy it. Then you do something else. The trick is the doing something else." ~ Leonardo da Vinci
"Life is never fair, and perhaps it is a good thing for most of us that it is not." ~ Oscar Wilde
"I do not need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better." ~ Plutarch
"The empty vessel makes the loudest sound." ~ William Shakespeare
"Wise men speak because they have something to say; fools because they have to say something." ~ Plato
"Nature does nothing in vain." ~ Aristotle
"Only entropy comes easy." ~ Anton Chekhov
"The artist is a receptacle for emotions that come from all over the place: from the sky, from the earth, from a scrap of paper, from a passing shape, from a spider's web." ~ Pablo Picasso
"In my view you cannot claim to have seen something until you have photographed it." ~ Émile Zola
"True artists are almost the only men who do their work for pleasure." ~ Auguste Rodin
"Art is a lie that makes us realize truth." ~ Pablo Picasso
"True friends stab you in the front." ~ Oscar Wilde
What I do not quite like
+ Cooked food.
+ People trying to convince me that the food they have or are willing to provide, whether it is pickles, cake or candies, is much healthier and much tastier than the yummy cellulose that is found in paper.
+ Being seen as nothing more than an irrational brute beast.
+ Being seen as a potential war-steed, even though I do not like fighting.
+ Being seen as nothing more than a potential meal for one predator or another.
+ Seeing my rider sad, depressed or overly miserable in one form or another.
+ People trying to convince me that the food they have or are willing to provide, whether it is pickles, cake or candies, is much healthier and much tastier than the yummy cellulose that is found in paper.
+ Being seen as nothing more than an irrational brute beast.
+ Being seen as a potential war-steed, even though I do not like fighting.
+ Being seen as nothing more than a potential meal for one predator or another.
+ Seeing my rider sad, depressed or overly miserable in one form or another.
What do I like instead?
+ Eating lots of fresh grass in many small meals throughout the day, most often so many that I eat nearly all the time.
+ Eating tasty paper whenever I get a chance.
+ Galloping through plains and walking amidst trees.
+ Getting a chance to spend a little time with my rider, to distract him from his misery.
+ Eating tasty paper whenever I get a chance.
+ Galloping through plains and walking amidst trees.
+ Getting a chance to spend a little time with my rider, to distract him from his misery.
What do I wish for?
+ My freedom. Nothing can be worth more.