Two young friends were walking along the beach discussing girls ...
"Ah, I don't know." complained Randall, "Girls just don't seem to be attracted to me."
"What d'ya mean?" asked Phil.
"Sure, there's a lot a really cute girls here." Randall explained "But they don't even give me a second look."
And Phil was struck with an idea. "We can fix that!" he rejoiced. "Just take a Banana and put it in your pants."
"A Banana?" Randall was stunned.
"Sure." Phil chided. "Girls will go crazy for you."
So Randall returned the next day with a Banana in his pants. But to his dismay, the girls noticed all right, but laughed uncontrollably. He felt humiliated. They were laughing so much that none of them could take the time to explain to him what they were laughing about.
Randall quickly hustled over to Phil's place to protest about what he felt was a joke played on him, recounting how every body on the beach, girls and guys both, laughed at him.
And Phil finally asked "Did you put the Banana in your pants?"
"Just look," Randall pointed out, turning around to show the Banana's bulge smack in the middle of the back of his pants.
A man and his wife had boarded the train going west from Ontario to Vancouver, Canada. It would be a long ride and they had brought with them some crackers, some fruit and bottled water and sodas to eat and drink during the journey. Just before the train entered one of the tunnels encountered during passage through the Rockies, they had each fetched out a Banana and had started to peel them. The man had just swallowed down some of his Banana as the train entered the tunnel. Suddenly, in the dark, the man shouted wildly, cautioning his wife "Millie, don't eat that Banana!"
"Why not Howard?" she asked calmly.
"I just took one bite and I've gone blind!"
Bert: "Hey, you've got a Banana in your ear!"
Ernie: "What?"
Bert: "I said, YOU'VE GOT A BANANA IN YOUR EAR!"
Ernie: "What? I can't hear you; I've got a Banana in my ear!"
Banana Sayings:
- Old Bananas never die; they just rot away.
- Too many Bananas spoil the bunch.
- Time flies like an arrow, but fruit flies like a Banana.
Q: How did the Mother Banana spoil the Baby Banana?
A: She left him out in the sun too long.
Q: Did you hear about the unlucky man who bought some bananas?
A: They were empty.
Q: What is yellow on the inside and green on the outside ?
A: A banana dressed up as a cucumber !
Q: What’s yellow and flashes?
A: A banana with a loose connection.
Q: What would you call two banana skins?
A: A pair of slippers.
Q: What was the highlight of the banana gymnast's performance?
A: A banana split.
Q: What do you call a banana sunburn?
A: A banana peel.
Q: Why was Anna not allowed to visit her King in his jungle kingdom?
A: He had the guards ban-anna from the castle.
Q: What was the name of the greatest Banana Soccer player?
A: Peele.
Q: Why couldn't the police catch the Banana?
A: The Banana Split
Q: Why don't bananas snore?
A: Because they don't want to wake up the rest of the bunch.
Q: Why did the banana go to the doctor's office?
A: He wasn't peeling well.
Q: What do you call the Banana that gets all the girls?
A: A Banana Smoothie
If you know any more banana jokes please send them to me and I'll add them here
